Lost Without You Page 6

  ‘Can’t I do dialysis at home? I’m sure I saw something in a magazine about a dialysis machine you can use at home.’

  ‘There are such machines,’ Dr Chopra said, glancing quizzically from Rebecca to Paige and back to Rebecca again, ‘but we prefer to start you off in hospital. I’m sure you have many questions and we’ll be happy to answer them shortly, but right now, I’m going to go organise your transfer to the renal health ward. Perhaps you can make a list of what you’ll need from home and someone can go get everything for you. A nurse will be in soon to get you ready. I’ll see you on the ward.’

  But, despite the bad medical news, getting Rebecca toiletries and spare clothes was the last thing on anyone’s mind. The moment the doctors pulled back the curtain, Paige put her hands on her hips and glanced between her mother and Solomon. ‘What’s this about a wedding?’

  Paige

  ‘Well?’ Paige looked between her mother and her boyfriend.

  ‘I’m sorry. I didn’t mean—’

  ‘It’s okay.’ Solomon gave her mum a forgiving smile, before turning back to Paige. ‘Well, this is the last place I planned on doing this and I had hoped on making it a little more special, but …’

  He dropped down on one knee in the middle of the room and drew a small box out of his pocket. ‘Luckily I’ve been too afraid to go anywhere without this since I bought it.’

  Looking up at her with his big, beautiful, near-jet-black eyes, he carefully peeled back the lid of the tiny, blue velvet box in his large hands.

  Paige sucked in a breath as she gazed down at the most beautiful square-diamond ring she’d ever seen. Her pulse raced at the realisation of what was happening.

  ‘Paige Marie MacRitchie, what can I say?’ He grinned cheekily. ‘From the day we met, I knew I didn’t want to live another day without you. I love everything about you and pretty much find all the same things infuriating. I love your kind heart, your big ideas and the way you can bring almost anyone round to your way of thinking, but at three in the morning, I have to say I prefer my sleep.’

  She giggled, having lost count of the number of times she’d woken him up in the middle of the night to tell him something or to ask his opinion on some idea she’d just come up with.

  He went on. ‘I love the way you click your tongue when you’re thinking or concentrating on a painting, except when I’m trying to watch TV. I adore your body, except your cold feet on my bare skin on a freezing night. I love your mind, but your hypothetical questions drive me crazy. No, I have not thought about what I would do if I had to choose between saving my family or saving a whole boat of refugees and neither do I want to.’

  She smiled at the way his tone was both doting and exasperated.

  ‘I love the way you clean when you’re mad, but not that I can’t find anything afterward. I could go on, but all you really need to know is that … When I’m with you, nothing else matters. You make me want to be a better person, you make me want to be someone that deserves someone like you.’

  ‘You do deserve me,’ Paige whispered, emotion choking her throat at his words.

  A glimmer of a smile twisted Solomon’s lips. ‘In that case … what I’m trying to say …’ He blinked and suddenly looked more nervous than ever before. ‘Is … Will you be my wife? Will you marry me?’

  Torn between terror at the shock of her mum’s sudden diagnosis and joy at Solomon’s beautiful words, tears trickled down Paige’s cheeks. Although she and Sol had been together almost two years and she couldn’t imagine herself ever being with anyone else, this proposal surprised her. They hadn’t talked about marriage and she’d never placed much value on the institution herself; despite her parents having a good one, it seemed old-fashioned and outdated. Yet, as Solomon’s arms wrapped around her and he pulled her down into his lap, Paige knew in no uncertain terms that she wanted to be his wife more than she’d ever wanted anything.

  ‘Yes.’ Salty tears snuck into her mouth as she stooped to kiss him. They kissed for a few long moments before she finally pulled back and looked into his now also-teary eyes.

  ‘I’m sorry. I just want to check. Was that a yes?’

  She nodded, unable to speak past the happy tears flooding her face.

  ‘It had better be,’ came her mother’s voice from the bed.

  She laughed as her father uttered, ‘Congratulations.’

  ‘Thanks,’ Paige and Sol said in unison, then she nodded to the little box still in his hand. ‘You know I only said yes so I can get that ring, right?’

  ‘I suspected as much.’ Laughing, he plucked the diamond from the box and slid it onto her finger.

  ‘It fits perfectly.’

  ‘I may have had a little help from your mother regarding size.’

  Paige looked to her parents. ‘You knew about this?’ Well, obviously they must have because it was her mother who’d broken the news only minutes ago, but nothing about today had been predictable.

  Her father nodded and his chest inflated with obvious pride. ‘Solomon came to us to ask for your hand and then your mother let him take her wedding ring to the jewellers because she knew the two of you have the same sized hands.’

  ‘I see.’ The feminist in her felt as if she should reprimand him for asking her parents’ permission to marry her—like she was some kind of object to pass from father to fiancé—but the romantic in her loved that he’d gone to so much trouble. She also loved the word ‘fiancé’ and planned to use it as much as she could over the next few months or however long it took to plan a wedding. ‘You’re my fiancé,’ she said.

  ‘And you’re my fiancée.’ He laughed, then kissed her again.

  ‘I’m so pleased for both of you,’ said Hugh, coming over to them.

  Paige stood and walked into his arms. ‘Thanks, Dad.’

  ‘Welcome to the family.’ Hugh gestured for Sol to join them. ‘You better look after my girl.’

  ‘Da-d!’ Paige rolled her eyes but secretly glowed inside.

  ‘I will. She’s my whole world.’

  ‘Hey? Don’t forget me over here,’ Rebecca called from the bed. ‘Do I get a hug too?’

  Paige rushed over and threw her arms around her mum. ‘Of course you do.’

  ‘Congratulations, darling,’ she whispered as she held her close and stroked her hair. ‘I couldn’t have picked a better man for you myself.’

  Paige wasn’t sure if the tears that streamed down her face were joyful or sad or a combination of both.

  ‘What’s the matter, darling?’

  Paige sniffed. ‘I’ve never felt so happy and so worried at the same time. I can’t believe how sick you are.’

  Rebecca, always stoic, scoffed at her words. ‘Don’t be silly! I’m going to be fine.’ Then she nodded towards the magazines Paige had brought with her earlier. ‘But, I want you to go buy some bridal magazines to replace those. At least then I can put my hours in this dreadful place to good use. When do you think you’ll get married?’

  Paige and Solomon looked at each other and shrugged.

  ‘Whenever Paige wants.’ Sol grinned. ‘We could get married tomorrow if you like!’

  ‘Quite aside from the fact you need to lodge your marriage notice a month before the big day, I’ll still be here tomorrow. I’ll never forgive myself for forcing you to propose in a hospital, but it’ll be over my dead body that you get married in one.’

  Paige flinched and, as if she’d just realised what she said, Rebecca slapped her hand over her mouth as her eyes widened.

  ‘There’ll be no dead bodies in our family for quite some time,’ said Hugh firmly. ‘But at least you’ll have a funny story to tell your grandchildren.’

  Grandchildren? Paige surprised herself by smiling at that far-off notion. She looked to Sol. ‘You and I will make beautiful babies.’

  He chuckled in the deep, sexy, throaty way she loved. ‘Let’s get married first.’

  They stared at each other a few long moments in a manner that would have ma
de her feel nauseous if she had to witness another couple doing it and then her father cleared his throat.

  ‘But as excited I am about this engagement, you heard the doctors, Rebecca—why don’t you tell me what you need from home and I’ll go get it.’

  Rebecca shook her head. ‘I’ll make a list, but Paige should go. She’ll get the right things whereas you …’

  Hugh smiled. ‘Fair enough. Paige?’

  ‘Of course we’ll go.’

  ‘I can’t believe what’s happening to Mum,’ Paige said as Solomon drove his pastel blue Valiant towards her parents’ place in Balmain. ‘It breaks my heart seeing her lying in that bed looking so vulnerable. I barely remember her having so much as a cold while I was growing up.’

  He put a comforting hand on her knee. ‘She’s a fighter, your mum. I’m sure she’ll be fine, but whatever happens, I’m here for you. Don’t forget that.’

  ‘Hmm.’ Usually if Sol so much as brushed his hand against her, Paige went crazy with desire, but she barely noticed his touch. She dug her phone back out of her bag.

  ‘What are you doing?’ he asked as she started tapping away.

  ‘Googling kidney transplants.’

  ‘Do you think that’s a good idea? The internet has all sorts of wrong information and the doctors said they’d be happy to answer any questions you have.’

  ‘I’m not stupid, Sol. I can tell the rubbish from reality, but it’s good to be informed.’

  He didn’t reply, just kept his eyes trained on the road and Paige felt suddenly guilty.

  ‘I’m sorry.’ She shoved her phone back in her bag. ‘I’m just …’

  ‘I know.’ He moved his hand from her knee and took hold of her hand. ‘I understand, I care about your mum too and I want her to get well.’

  ‘Thank you,’ she whispered, tears threatening again. ‘I suppose it could be worse. She could require a heart or lung transplant or something like that, which means someone would have to die for her to live. A kidney transplant has to be much more straightforward, right?’

  ‘I would think so.’

  ‘And I’m sorry your proposal wasn’t how you intended it to be. Were you really going to propose last night at the launch?’

  He nodded and let out a half laugh. ‘I’ve been planning it for weeks. I went around and gave everyone party poppers to unleash the moment you said yes. Lord, I was hoping you’d say yes. I’d also hired a suite in a flash hotel in the city and had the bed decorated with rose petals and chocolates. I was going to whisk you away and make mad passionate love to you all night long.’

  ‘Really?’ He’d never been the gushy gesture type—he was far more likely to show his love by bringing her favourite takeaway to The Art House when she was working late or agreeing to pose naked when she wanted to practise her still life drawing. ‘What kind of chocolates?’

  ‘Okay, I had booked a hotel room but I lied about the rose petals and the chocolates. And I planned to fuck your brains out the moment we walked in the door.’

  Paige snorted and would have elbowed him in the side if he hadn’t been driving. ‘Solomon Soulie, your mother would wash your mouth out with soap if she heard you speaking like that!’

  ‘When I think about fucking you, I’m not thinking about my mother.’

  And with those very naughty words, her fiancé succeeded in distracting her from her worries about her mother. ‘Drive faster,’ she ordered, squeezing her knees together.

  By the time Paige and Solomon returned to the hospital with a small suitcase containing all her mother had requested, Rebecca had been transferred to the ward. Although she had a double room, the bed beside her was empty and they arrived to find Hugh asleep and snoring on top of it. Paige’s heart squeezed at the sight. The news of her mum’s illness had obviously taken its toll on him. Her parents had the perfect marriage and were so attuned to each other that she couldn’t imagine one without the other. It would utterly break him if something happened to her mother and he had to learn to live without her.

  Shaking her head of that thought, Paige turned her attentions to her mum, who was wide awake and not looking any happier about being confined to a bed. ‘Hey. Hopefully we brought everything you asked for.’

  ‘Thanks, my darlings.’ Rebecca’s smile looked forced.

  ‘Where shall I put this?’ Solomon asked.

  ‘Just put it on that movey-table thing there and I’ll unpack.’ Paige tried to be quiet as she put her mum’s things into the cupboard but her father woke up a few moments into the exercise.

  ‘Hello.’ He blinked as if disorientated and bolted upright. ‘I must have drifted off.’

  ‘Lucky you,’ Rebecca said. ‘I don’t know how you could sleep through all the noise in this place. Hopefully they give me something to knock me out tonight.’

  As she said this, a young man rapped on the door and popped his head inside. ‘Ready for dinner?’

  ‘Has hospital food improved any in the last twenty-or-so years?’

  The man—who didn’t appear much older than a boy—blinked; he might not even have been alive twenty years ago. ‘Um.’

  ‘Mu-m,’ Paige reprimanded. ‘Ignore her. Of course she’s ready for dinner. Thank you.’ As the boy carried a tray tentatively into the room, Solomon whipped the suitcase off the table so he could put it down and Paige spoke firmly to her mother. ‘You need to eat to keep your strength up. Your body will be working overtime to fix itself.’

  ‘She’s right, love,’ Hugh said, sniffing the air in the direction of the tray. ‘And it doesn’t actually smell too bad.’

  Rebecca harrumphed and lifted the lid on the food as the boy all but fled from the room.

  ‘Thanks,’ Solomon called after him.

  ‘What are you three going to eat?’ Rebecca asked, picking up a bread roll and breaking it in half.

  ‘I’ll go see if the hospital café is still open,’ Solomon offered.

  Her dad decided to stretch his legs and join Solomon on the mission, while Paige continued unpacking and trying to make the room feel a little more cosy.

  ‘I brought a couple of photos for you,’ she said, putting two small frames up on the bedside table. One of her parents walking in the Blue Mountains and one of herself and her mother at Paige’s twenty-first birthday party.

  The others returned just as she finished organising everything.

  ‘Café closed,’ Hugh announced.

  ‘But we bought up the vending machines!’ Sol held out his hands, which were full of chips, chocolate and lollies. Her dad was carrying a similar haul. It appeared they’d both forgotten about her diabetes. Oh well, she wasn’t the one they needed to worry about tonight and she’d make sure she ate enough and properly as soon as she could. There was always the emergency pack of crackers in her bag.

  As Rebecca continued picking at her food and Solomon and Hugh began to devour their junk, Paige zipped up the now-empty suitcase and grabbed her handbag.

  ‘Look what I found.’ She pulled her parents’ wedding album out of her bag as if she were Mary Poppins pulling out the hat stand. ‘Ta-dah!’

  ‘Is that what I think it is?’ asked Rebecca.

  ‘Oh my,’ Hugh exclaimed through a mouthful of Snickers bar. ‘We haven’t looked through that in years.’

  ‘I know. And Sol hasn’t seen the photos, so I thought it would be fun in the light of our engagement for you to tell us about your wedding day.’

  ‘Seems so long ago, I can hardly remember.’ Rebecca pushed aside the tray. ‘Give it here then.’

  Paige handed over the album, which was one of those old ones where you peeled back the plastic and put the photo underneath. Rebecca lifted the faded gold cover and food was quickly forgotten as the four of them got lost in 1988.

  ‘Geez, that’s some dress,’ Sol said, pointing at the photo of her mother getting out of a car at the church. Eye-blinding white satin, huge puffy shoulders, pearl beading, lace sleeves, a massive bow at the back and a thoroughly imprac
tical-length train—her mother’s wedding dress had it all and was the epitome of eighties fashion. Atop her already larger-than-life dark, permed hair was a tulle veil that spread out at the back of her head like a lizard’s frill. The bridesmaids were dressed in aqua-green, satin, short strapless gowns, also adorned with gigantic bows, big hair and big earrings.

  ‘We didn’t do anything by halves in the eighties. We all wanted to be Princess Di, although I don’t think any of us wanted to marry Prince Charles.’

  ‘I think you look gorgeous, Mum. Where did you get the dress? How many did you try on before you found the right one?’

  ‘Actually, I won it. Mum entered me in a competition at a new bridal shop that had opened in the city and she and Dad were over the moon when we won, because his policeman’s wage didn’t stretch to a fancy wedding. We were on a strict budget.’

  ‘That’s right. I’d forgotten that,’ said Hugh. ‘Lucky you liked it.’

  ‘How could you not like it? And look what a spunk you were, Dad.’

  Paige flicked to another page with a photo of her parents cutting their cake. Her father looked like the cat that got the cream in a dashing black dinner suit, white-satin waistcoat and the classic white carnation with baby’s breath pinned to his lapel. His cheesy adoring smile made her heart sing and the way he looked at her mother was exactly how she wanted Sol to look at her on their wedding day.

  ‘I’m still a spunk, aren’t I, love?’ Hugh winked at Rebecca.

  She shook her head with a smirk as she flicked to the next page. The photos had yellowed a little but love and fun shone from every image. At the reception, the bridal party sat at a long table, also adorned with bows, aqua and gold balloons, and confetti. It was your clichéd eighties wedding with prawn cocktails for entrée, beef and salmon for mains and a four-tiered fruit cake that apparently looked better than it tasted.

  ‘What song was your first dance to?’ Paige asked as she gazed down at her parents locked in a passionate embrace.

  Rebecca frowned and looked to Hugh as if she couldn’t quite remember. ‘Was it “I Should Be So Lucky” by Kylie?’